Pretences
by NightKitty666
Summary: Tag to s1e6 - after Hotch has to beat up Reid in order to survive being held hostage by the LDSK, Reid claims that he's fine and dismisses Hotch with a smile. Of course he's not going to tell Hotch that he was actually hurt; he doesn't want to make his boss feel guilty for keeping them alive. But as time goes on, he finds it harder than he thought he would to keep it under wraps.


**AN – Hello everyone! This is another piece that I found buried on my computer and finally decided to finish. It's based on the episode LDSK, which is my all-time favourite Criminal Minds episode; I just love the storyline, and I think the scene with Hotch and Reid trapped in the hospital is so well done. So this is my take on what might have happened after that scene – I hope you enjoy it. Just to note, it's slightly AU in the sense that Hotch and Haley have already divorced in this story, with Hotch living in his own apartment and Jack under Haley's care for most of the time. And no, I don't own Criminal Minds, the characters etc. If I did, Hotch and Reid would have gotten together very early on as I think they're an adorable couple. Anyway, on with the show!**

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"Hotch, I was a 12-year-old child prodigy in a Las Vegas public high school. You kick like a nine-year-old girl." He smiled up at his superior as the older man laughed. Then he remembered the gun that was resting beside him and offered it up to Hotch. The older man held up a hand and dismissed it, telling Reid to keep it; he'd passed his firearms qualification in Hotch's eyes. Reid thanked him warmly and Hotch smiled before turning away to go discuss procedures with the local cops.

As soon as Hotch was out of earshot, Reid let out a groan. His stomach was throbbing as a dark bruise began to form across his skin. He'd put on a brave face in front of his superior, not wanting to make the other man feel guilty for doing what he had to do to get them out of the situation alive, but, he was in agony and could barely restrain himself from crying out. He knew he'd just have to suck it up until he was safe in the privacy of his own home, but the thought of having to endure an hour-long plane journey without saying anything filled him with a slight sense of dread. There was a long list of ways that this could go wrong.

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Reid began to relax into the flight when he realised that everyone was exhausted and was paying little attention to him. He shifted around in his seat until he found a position that was bearable, and was almost drifting off to sleep when Gideon slid into a seat opposite him and began talking to him. They discussed the emotions behind killing a man for the first time, and Reid felt comforted by Gideon's expression of pride in him, but as soon as the older man left the feelings of pain and discomfort returned. No matter how much he tried, he was unable to find the tolerable position he'd found before, and all the tossing and turning made him start to feel nauseous.

He did his best to suppress the feeling, but it grew on him until he knew he'd reached the point where he was going to be sick. He stood abruptly and began to make his way down the aisle towards the bathroom. His heart sank when he saw Hotch sitting in the seat closest to the bathroom door; there was no way he could do this without attracting the attention of the older profiler. Hotch looked up at him as he made his way past his boss and into the bathroom, smiling slightly to try and deflect Hotch's concerned gaze. As soon as he was safely in the bathroom, he stopped restraining the feelings of nausea and allowed himself to throw up into the sink. He stood hunched over it for several minutes as wave after wave of sickness hit him, until eventually there was nothing left in his stomach. He rinsed his mouth out with water and dried his face off before steeling himself to the task of going back out and facing his team again. He just prayed that nobody had heard him.

He slid the latch back on the door and pushed it cautiously open. Nervously, he stepped out into the corridor, jumping when he found himself coming face to face with Hotch. His boss' eyes were stern and unreadable, so he dropped his gaze and tried to push past Hotch and return to his seat. However, Hotch caught his arm to stop him from leaving, spinning the younger man round to face him. Worry was beginning to show through his harsh stare, and in the quietest voice he could manage to avoid alerting everybody else, he asked, "Reid, are you okay?"

Reid swallowed before replying, "I'm fine," and trying to make another getaway. Hotch was still gripping his arm, though, so he was unable to escape.

"Reid, you were throwing up. I heard you. Don't tell me that you're fine." Reid couldn't tell if Hotch was angry, concerned or both. He didn't know how to respond so he just stood there silently, his eyes looking down at the floor.

Eventually, his whirring mind settled on a reply. "I don't know what you're talking about," he muttered, unsure whether provoking his boss was a good idea but reasoning that denial was his best way out of this.

Hotch sighed in frustration. "Reid, don't give me that," he scolded. "I want to know what's going on." Reid stayed quiet, his gaze drifting around the floor but never coming close to Hotch's face. Hotch realised he wasn't going to say anything while they were in earshot of practically the whole team, so he dragged Reid down to aisle to the far end of the plane. They seated themselves opposite each other, then Hotch began again. "Reid, what's going on?" he asked gently, hoping that a bit of compassion might draw the truth out of his subordinate.

Reid sighed and wrung his hands together; he knew that he couldn't get out of this, and cursed himself for being so careless. As Hotch continued to glare at him, he realised that he'd better come up with an answer soon. "I... uh... I wasn't feeling well," he said simply, hoping that Hotch would just leave it there.

"What was it?" his superior probed.

Reid hunched his shoulders and stopped his eyes from meeting Hotch's. "It was nothing. Really."

Hotch raised an eyebrow at him. "Reid," he warned, frustrated by his stubbornness.

The genius sighed, realising that sooner or later he'd have to tell his boss the truth. "Okay," he began. "I just... I haven't been feeling well since the confrontation with Dowd. Specifically, since you... you know..." He trailed off, not knowing how to admit that Hotch had caused this.

Hotch's face fell as it dawned on him what Reid was trying to say. "I thought you said I didn't hurt you. You lied?" His question was more bewildered than accusatory, but it still caused Reid to drop his gaze to his lap.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I didn't want to tell you because... You were only doing what you had to do. You got us out of there alive. I didn't want you to feel guilty."

Hotch stared at Reid sadly; he knew he was right, that he'd only done what was necessary in the circumstances, but he couldn't stop hating the fact that he'd hurt his friend. His job was to protect his teammates, to keep them from harm, and he felt like he'd failed Reid.

"I… don't know what to say, Reid," he replied at last. "I'm very sorry that I hurt you. I wish there was something else that I could have done."

Reid looked up at him again, his gaze soft and kind. "Hotch, you know I don't blame you. It's just the job; sometimes, you get hurt. I'll be okay. It's nothing, really."

Hotch nodded slowly. "Okay. But I want to help take care of you until you're feeling better. It's the least I can do for you. So you're coming to my place tonight, no arguments. You have spare clothes is your go-bag?"

"Yeah," Reid said with a small smile. He didn't think that his injury was serious enough to warrant all this fuss, but he was touched by Hotch's concern for him, and he didn't want to turn down the opportunity to spend some time with Hotch away from work. He enjoyed the older man's company, and found himself feeling safe and reassured in his presence. "Thank you for doing this for me," he added. "You don't have to."

"I want to, Reid. It would make me feel better knowing that you were okay. And Jack's with Haley this week, so I have a spare room."

Reid could tell what Hotch wasn't saying. He knew the man felt isolated in his apartment without the company of his son, so he was trying to fill the void by having a guest. The genius was more than happy to oblige, knowing how much it would mean to Hotch, and he didn't particularly want to return to his own empty apartment anyway.

"Okay. Thanks," he responded finally. Hotch gave him a warm smile and he relaxed back into his seat, a sense of relief washing over him. Keeping his condition hidden from his boss had been a struggle, so he was thankful that the man now knew. He felt calm at last, and the lack of tension caused his stomach pain to begin to ebb, allowing him to get comfortable in his chair again. His gaze drifted to the window, and as he watched the silver clouds floating past, he could feel his eyelids starting to close. This was the first time he'd been able to properly rest since the incident, and he began to realise how exhausted he was. They'd been working non-stop for days, and being held hostage had certainly taken its toll on him as well. Knowing that they would be in the air for at least another hour, he let his eyes fall closed and permitted himself to steal a few moments of precious sleep.

The whine of the engines was what finally woke him, the changing tone signifying that they were coming in to land, and he brushed a hand over his face before looking out to see the plane descending on a familiar landscape. Glancing up, he noticed that Hotch was watching him with a small smile, making him suddenly self-conscious.

"Hi," he said quietly, his voice coming out as little more than a whisper.

"Hi," responded Hotch warmly. "I'm glad to see you got some sleep. You deserve it."

"Thanks." He looked down sheepishly, feeling embarrassed to have such attention from Hotch.

Before his superior could reply, the plane lurched suddenly as it hit the runway. Reid fumbled around next to his seat for his messenger bag, anticipating their upcoming exit from the plane. He saw his teammates also gathering up their belongings, eager to return home after an exhausting case. Eventually the plane slowed to a halt and the agents filed towards the door, Hotch making sure that Reid was following close behind him. Everyone said their goodbyes and dispersed, Reid making sure to stick with Hotch so that the older agent could lead him to his car.

The journey back to the apartment was smooth and silent, Reid feeling too tired to want to strike up a conversation and Hotch happy to leave the other man in peace as he drove them both back home. Once they'd arrived, Reid moved to retrieve his go-bag from the trunk, but found Hotch pulling him back, insisting on carrying the luggage himself. The older man led them inside and into the stairwell, ascending floor by floor until they'd reached his apartment. Reid knew the way; he'd been invited over once or twice for team gatherings, but this was the first time he'd be entering Hotch's home just the two of them, and the thought made him nervous as they climbed the final flight of stairs. As Hotch began to unlock his apartment door, Reid fidgeted with the strap of his messenger bag, suddenly questioning if this was a good idea. He'd come to the realisation a few weeks ago that there might be something more to his relationship with his boss; the man was always so empathetic and caring towards him, more so, he'd noticed, than towards any other member of the team. He'd had his suspicions as to why Hotch and Haley had divorced, and it seemed to fit with the extra attention he'd been giving Reid pretty much since he'd joined the team, but he couldn't be sure if his analysis was correct. He'd never been as proficient with relationships as his friends, so he was uncertain as to whether he was simply misreading the signals. If Hotch was indeed interested in him, he knew that he'd say yes in a heartbeat. Hotch always made him protected and important, plus he had to admit that he was very handsome. But how could he tell what Hotch's true feelings were without asking him? The man was so closed off with his emotions that it would be impossible to tell without a direct question, and if he spent the evening alone with Hotch, he was more than likely to let such a question slip at some stage. But if he was wrong, he didn't know how he would backpedal without causing an awkwardness between them, and he didn't want to risk the friendship he had with Hotch.

"Reid, are you okay?" Hotch's voice broke him out of his thoughts. He realised that he'd been standing silently outside the door for several minutes while Hotch had been holding it open for him, waiting or him to enter the apartment. Taking a moment to compose himself, he managed a small smile and moved towards the door.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Stepping into the living room, he glanced around at the furnishings and decorations, all of which looked exactly the same as he'd remembered. He slipped his messenger bag from his shoulders and placed it by the door, next to the go-bag that Hotch had set down. The door was closed behind him as he walked further into the room, absentmindedly skimming his gaze over the book titles on Hotch's shelves.

"Would you like a drink?" his host asked, causing him to turn around to face the older man.

"Water would be good, thanks." He watched as Hotch disappeared into the kitchen, returning a few moments later with two glasses of water, one of which he handed across to Reid. He motioned to the couch and they sat down next to each other. Reid quickly took a sip of his water as anticipation once again began to rise in his chest, not knowing what to say now that he was alone with Hotch. Fidgeting in his seat, he began rhythmically tapping his fingers against his glass.

Hotch put down his own water, instantly noticing Reid's behaviour. "What's wrong?" he asked softly, hoping that his colleague would trust him enough to confide in him.

"Nothing," Reid replied a little too quickly.

Hotch raised an eyebrow at him. "You know that's not going to work on me," he warned teasingly.

Letting out a sigh, Reid knew he wasn't going to get out of this one. "It's just that… I have a question I've been wanting to ask you, but I'm not sure if now's the right time."

"Oh? What is it?"

"It's nothing really. It's just that…" He trailed off, not knowing how to phrase it without potentially scaring Hotch away.

Watching the way Reid was shifting nervously in his seat, he had a pretty good idea what the younger man was wanting to ask him. There were only a handful of topics that made Reid this uncomfortable, so he was able to form a conclusion fairly quickly. "Reid," he started, wanting to help ease the genius' discomfort, "is it about… us?"

Reid looked confused for a moment as to how his boss had figured out what he was going to say, before he remembered how adept Hotch was at profiling. "Yes," he responded quietly.

Hotch studied the younger man's face, the uncertainty in his eyes. He'd been suspecting this topic would come up for a while, yet he found himself a little unprepared now that it had. "I think I know what you were going to ask me," Hotch said at last. "And the answer is… yes."

"Yes… what?" Reid needed clarification, he needed to know if Hotch was saying what he thought he was saying.

Hotch took a moment to prepare himself before responding, "yes, I have feelings for you." He smiled slightly as he added, "I didn't know it was that obvious."

Reid shifted his gaze down, fiddling with his hands. "I had an idea, but I didn't know for sure."

Hotch's face fell slightly as he observed Reid's reaction. The man seemed uneasy rather than pleased, and he began to wonder if he'd made a mistake by admitting to his feelings. "Should I not have told you?"

"What? No." Reid finally looked up and met Hotch's gaze. "I'm glad I know, Hotch, because I… it's not just you. I have feelings for you, too."

Relief broke out across Hotch's face as he heard Reid's declaration. "Reid, I… Thank you. That's the best news I've heard in a long time." He gave his subordinate a warm smile, which Reid returned readily. "So… Where do you want to go from here?"

"How about a date?" Reid replied, a small blush beginning to colour his cheeks. "Something away from work?"

"That sounds perfect. I'll take you out on a date tomorrow if you're up for it. But for now I think you should be getting some rest, you look exhausted." Reid couldn't deny it; while his short sleep on the plane had been a help, it hadn't been nearly enough to properly refresh him, and his stomach pains were beginning to return. He allowed Hotch to lead him towards the bedroom, where he quickly changed into his sleepshirt and prepared himself for bed. Hotch saw that he was comfortable before heading back towards the living room. "I'll take the couch," he said as he was leaving.

"Wait," Reid called before Hotch had reached the bedroom door. "Would you… stay with me?" He felt childish for asking, but he knew how empty the room would feel without his superior's presence.

Instead of arguing with the request as Reid had expected him to, Hotch quickly turned around and returned to the bed, sitting down on top of the covers. Reid sheepishly pulled back the duvet, and Hotch, perfectly understanding his meaning, slipped under the covers next to the younger man. He was delighted that Reid felt relaxed enough to do this with him, and the feel of Reid's warmth next to him was very soothing, so much so that he quickly found himself struggling to keep his eyes open.

"Goodnight, Reid," he said gently as he laid his head back on the pillow.

"Goodnight," Reid replied, his voice full of contentment. Hotch reached over to the light switch above the bedside cabinet and turned off the light, the room slowly falling into darkness.


End file.
